Category: SLEEP

Maybe there’s time to rest.

by Jody, posted in SLEEP, tools - rest

I just finished offering a two-night workshop series this week with a CHEO (Children’s Hospital of Eastern Ontario) program that provides peer support to parents of children with complex medical needs.

The topic – sleep.

How did the facilitator, one of the Moms, introduce the topic on the first night?

“Beautiful, delicious, sweet, wonderful, elusive, lovely, sometimes a jerk – sleep.”

Anyone who is a parent will know the trials and tribulations encountered when your child is sick. Yet, imagine how you might find sleep when your child depends on feeding tubes or respirators as they can’t breathe on their own at night.

I didn’t have the opportunity to learn as much as I might like about them. That they showed up for an hour on two separate late evenings to do so inspires me. Suggests there is a need.

It is always challenging in planning and preparation to balance experiential practices with information. Experience is helpful for people but my role as I see it, is to also teach people mechanisms as to why these practices might help.

To provide tools that might be able to influence the elusiveness of sleep, when life is often so full of uncertainty. To gain a sense of agency over their own personal experience.

Perhaps,

  • How they might give themselves permission to… rest. Seems so simple yet in our culture, not so much.
  • How they might take two minutes in the day, to notice what and how they feel and respond in some way with some helpful practices. With compassion.

As I’ve learned from mentors such as Shelly Prosko, Physiotherapist and Yoga Therapist (via research by Kristen Neff on self-compassion) a simple mantra or affirmation of kindness to oneself,

“It’s okay”, as you breathe in.

As you breathe out “This is enough.”

Can this be enough, just as it is?

I can at times feel anxious before doing this work. Is it enough? This week seemed more so, with all that’s going on and feeling not quite myself, rather fatigued.

In the end, I hope the sessions served to support them in some way.

As feedback from the facilitator, “The fact that these moms actually took an hour out of their time to join us is so wonderful. They do not take that time for themselves often enough. A lot of times they do not even have an hour to do anything other than care for their children. So, thank you for giving them that chance to restore and relax.”

I am most grateful for the opportunity. So much credit to these parents and really to anyone, all of us, caring for one another.

Might there also be time to care for ourselves, as well.

Permission to rest…

Strike a Match

by Jody, posted in how to begin, mindfulness, SLEEP

Each night as we gather together for dinner there are always lit candles on the table. If there doesn’t happen to be a table, there are still candles lit somewhere nearby.

Nearly always we spend time to ‘set’ the table. It’s a thing in our family. When I was growing up, this was mostly reserved for Sunday dinner. However, while living overseas with our own young family it was like this every evening. Partly as the kitchen was all tiled (yes ALL the walls as well the floors) and so we chose to eat in the dining room. Our table was also one that needed placemats so as not to damage it, so every night there would be placemats, candles, napkins, the works. Everything placed… just so.

I have always appreciated ritual. It seems to bring something a little special to the table, so to speak.

What’s the difference between a habit or a ritual? And are they always helpful?

The word ritual comes from Latin ritualis, from ritus (see rite). Rite, often used in rite of passage, or “social custom, practice, or conventional act”. Both, often used in religious terms. I think of them more in terms of transitioning. How might we move from one thing to another, with some sense of it all.

Times of transition are when we often get stuck. Have difficulty. How do we move from one thing to another? It might be a life transition. Perhaps it’s transitioning from our work day to home life (blurred lines at the moment). Seems we are in a time of huge transitions. Or maybe it’s from wakefulness to sleep. Or from sleep to wakefulness. Acknowledging there IS a transition taking place can be helpful.

I like to have a cup of coffee first thing in the morning. This habit makes it tricky for other things to occur afterwards. The coffee leads to breakfast and suddenly I don’t feel like doing yoga asana or movement. My early morning window of opportunity is gone. I’ve worked to change this at times, but it’s ever so easy to slip back into familiar patterns. This habit, not all that supportive.

What if we turned habits into rituals? Rather than these automatic patterns we have accumulated over the years that served us well (or not) we create specific rituals to support transitions with a little more ease.

Waking up and then what? Is there available space or time for … maybe something other than coffee? What can you do that sets you up for your day? A nourishing breakfast. Solitude. Prayer or meditation. Fresh air or exercise. Or it is straight in to the demands of the day?

From work day to evening. Time alone, or with your partner, or family. Maybe allowance for what each person needs to transition from one to the other.

For me, one ritual is to set the table. Place the candles. Strike the match. … the ritual, the transition. This making way from one setting to another. We set aside what came before and meet together in this new space.

Rather than your usual habits what might be some rituals that support your transition from evening to sleep?

Curious to explore this further? Click the link below where we’ll explore this transitioning during the day and into our sleep. We begin tomorrow!

more info here

As I write this, feeling deep gratitude for my teacher Anne. Who reignited the significance, relevance of this ritual for me personally. Not just lighting the candles, but striking a match and doing so with purposeful intention.

What rituals are most meaningful in your life? How did you learn them? Why do you choose to carry them forward? I’d love to hear from you.

Bright Lights, Dim Prospects & Daunting News

by Jody, posted in science, SLEEP, tools - rest

One of the basics of sleep hygiene is to sleep in a darkened room. Kind of a no-brainer.

However, what is a common reason people wake up in the night? If you’re like me, it’s often to go to the bathroom. Where are the brightest lights in your whole house? Likely the bathroom. Imagine the signal these bright lights are sending to your sleep systems?

Maybe you wake up for some other reason and next thing you know, you’re scrolling on your phone. Many are aware there’s a way to switch it from Light to Dark mode so perhaps the light won’t interfere with you getting back to sleep – too much.

Yet, what is the content you’re reading? Is it news? Social media? Is it something that might alert or arouse your nervous system or thoughts… late at night? Both, seem to have a way to wind things up for many.

These are a few of the things we will be exploring in Rest & Restore: Strategies for Sleep that begins Feb 16th. Each Tuesday night we’ll dig into some of the research around sleep. Then, explore some practices to help calm your sleep systems or change some unsupportive sleep patterns. Add in some quiet time and finally an opportunity to ask questions, connect with others should that be of interest you.

Though the sessions will be on Zoom, if you’re not a Zoom user or are experiencing Zoom fatigue, everything will be available for you to view on your own schedule, at your own convenience on the Teach:able platform.

CLICK HERE FOR DETAILS